90 Day Cleanse

Days 50-56: Why Am I Getting Adult Acne?

OK before I start the weekly recap…so I’m shifting for now to do weekly posts on the cleanse rather than daily — the daily ones have been really hard to keep up with, and I’m going to try to go for quality over quantity. The rationale is that by doing fewer posts, I’ll have time to do better QUALITY posts and they’ll ultimately be more impactful and I’ll have time to do more “how to” posts vs. just posting pics of my food.

Adult Acne, Sleep, & Stress

Look, honestly, this past week has been hard. Adult acne is the worst, I’m way past being a teenager, so I keep feeling like, why is this still happening to me? I had horrible acne all over my forehead all week which made me feel super self-conscious and on multiple days didn’t get enough sleep, which made me really cranky and irritable. I noticed myself snapping at things or feeling irritated by things I usually would have just let go. I hate not feeling in control of things like my skin because it feels like just one more thing in my life that I don’t have control over. Which is really scary.

Otherwise, a lot of other changes have been happening in my life on a personal level and I’ve been feeling generally really overwhelmed. I think the stress is affecting not only my digestive system but also definitely my SKIN. Somehow I’m 27 years old and still struggling with adult acne. Somehow I’m eating super clean and exercising and doing all the things that I feel like I’m supposed to be doing, but still having these issues. I feel like I can’t catch a break. And the skin stuff does affect a lot of other areas in my life. It makes me feel worse when I’m presenting at work since I’m on Zoom calls all day. It makes me not want to go to the beach or get in the water because it’ll wash the foundation off. It makes me not want to really do anything social where I’ll sweat for that same reason, and also fear that the sweat will make the zits worse.

I’m trying something new here though — historically, I tend to default to a place where I basically just take tons of supplements trying to fix myself when something’s going wrong. I had the realization on Sunday that I want to try to scale back on the supplements and really just try to better manage my stress. And try even though it’s FUCKING HARD to accept myself as I am. Be kind to myself when things aren’t going the way I want them to. Be patient and accept that the journey is the journey. Time takes time.

But fuck if it isn’t hard.

Now, back to some of our regularly scheduled food photo programming.

Diet Recap

Had a few notable meals that I’ll share, and honestly everything else is kind of a wash to me. I’m just trying to do the best I can here, especially as this goes on. And have this be more of an experiment in self-testing and seeing what my body reacts to or not. Because as this point, it will and does tell me.

Salmon + green beans + zucchini soup

Pan-fried salmon + roasted green beans. The zucchini soup was out of this world, actually. Both comforting and satisfying. And it was just zucchini, rosemary, bone broth, garlic, onion, lemon, S&P i believe… Not even any oil. We’re planning on making this in big batches going forward and freezing it for easy future mid-day meals.

Salmon + roasted green beans + an INSANE zucchini soup.

Buffalo cauliflower + curried veggies with egg + fresh avocado salad

Buffalo cauliflower has been a go-to as well lately… it’s just so damn easy! Toss the cauliflower in some egg, bake at 460 until the whole thing is brown and crunchy, toss again in buffalo sauce + a little garlic + a little ghee. I’ve realized that it honestly tastes just as good without adding as much ghee/oil. Easier on the tum that way too.

The curried veggies were interesting because honestly I just haven’t been using that flavor profile. Just the S&B mix, a mix of different spices like fenugreek, star anise, fennel, and cardamom that I don’t use on the reg. Found at the local Japanese grocery store šŸ™‚ Basically just used that curry powder with some coconut aminos and stir-fried assorted mix veg.

Cauliflower risotto + pan-fried salmon + avocado w/ masago + pan-fried kale with cucumber and microgreens

Pretty much as described. I’m mostly including this because it was a meal made from essentially just leftovers and very simple ingredients that ended up looking visually beautiful (which honestly makes me really happy whenever I see a nicely plated/photographed plate) and tasted delicious. The masago (fish eggs) add a really nice pop of color, and I feel like the microgreens and cucumber jazz up the kale a little. Gotta keep the diet interesting, otherwise, it honestly starts feeling kind of intolerable. And then cooking in general ends up feeling like a chore, a means to an end, rather than a pleasure.

Almond flour pancakes w/ bacon + matcha

Honestly, this was not entirely compliant because of the bacon + nuts and lack of veggies. But girlfriend made it and delivered it to me like this and I thought it was too pretty not to share. I personally never have the patience to make and stack multiple pancakes… I end up just eating them as I’m frying them.. šŸ™‚ I ate the pancakes with matcha and ended up putting the bacon in a salad later as a compromise.

How’d I Do?

So. Instead of making this a rating, I think I’m just going to end up talking about my thoughts here. Hey, overall, I’m doing pretty well with this diet. I haven’t had a vagina issue in at least a couple weeks now. I almost forgot what it felt like to feel “normal” and “not slightly itchy 24/7.” I’ve been struggling and not feeling in control due to my skin issues, but I’m truly trying to just have faith in the process and that it’ll all work itself out. And, speaking in the retrospective as I’m behind on the blog, my skin does appear, weeks, later now, to have finally chilled out. I’m not sure why or how, but I sure am grateful.